2012.
A new year and a new chance to be better.
In lieu of a long list of personal and professional goals (neatly written and categorized),
I'm taking a new approach to New Year's Resolutions.
This year, I have one word which I will live by,
and a small list of affirmations which I will repeat and believe and allow to resonate within me.
My word is NOURISH.
I will nourish my spirit,
I will nourish my body,
I will nourish my mind,
I will nourish my marriage,
I will nourish my individual relationship with each of my three children.
I will nourish the relationships with those closest to me.
I will nourish the virtue of gratitude, and count my many blessings.
I will let go of those things which bind me and weigh me down, those things which are unimportant and unfulfilling.
My personal affirmations are these:
I am a daughter of a Heavenly Father who loves me, and I love Him.
I am strong and capable.
I am determined.
I am happy.
I can do hard things.
I can make myself better. I will make myself better.
I am grateful, for my life is richly blessed.
Welcome, 2012.
A new year and a new chance to be better.
In lieu of a long list of personal and professional goals (neatly written and categorized),
I'm taking a new approach to New Year's Resolutions.
This year, I have one word which I will live by,
and a small list of affirmations which I will repeat and believe and allow to resonate within me.
My word is NOURISH.
I will nourish my spirit,
I will nourish my body,
I will nourish my mind,
I will nourish my marriage,
I will nourish my individual relationship with each of my three children.
I will nourish the relationships with those closest to me.
I will nourish the virtue of gratitude, and count my many blessings.
I will let go of those things which bind me and weigh me down, those things which are unimportant and unfulfilling.
My personal affirmations are these:
I am a daughter of a Heavenly Father who loves me, and I love Him.
I am strong and capable.
I am determined.
I am happy.
I can do hard things.
I can make myself better. I will make myself better.
I am grateful, for my life is richly blessed.
Welcome, 2012.
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My word, and affirmations for 2012
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I'm starting a new project. It's one that won't take hours of my time, nor is it one I think I'll fail at doing.
Two months ago, I purchased a new personal assistant/entertainer/camera/running partner/personal trainer/weather man/alarm/library (I just keep thinking of things!). It's called the iPhone 4s. I've loved snapping pictures and taking video with my new device because it's easy, it's always around, and the quality of the images is relatively good.
My new project can be found in this post-- I will combine, at the end of each month, a collage of my instagram photos detailing my life, along with a brief description of each photo. I hope this will appease those of my far-away family members who have insinuated some displeasure at my lack of personal blogging lately. :)
Here's how our December went down, more or less ::
Two months ago, I purchased a new personal assistant/entertainer/camera/running partner/personal trainer/weather man/alarm/library (I just keep thinking of things!). It's called the iPhone 4s. I've loved snapping pictures and taking video with my new device because it's easy, it's always around, and the quality of the images is relatively good.
My new project can be found in this post-- I will combine, at the end of each month, a collage of my instagram photos detailing my life, along with a brief description of each photo. I hope this will appease those of my far-away family members who have insinuated some displeasure at my lack of personal blogging lately. :)
Here's how our December went down, more or less ::
1. Paco, the Portuguese Elf came to our doorstep on Dec. 1st and watched us carefully, reporting to Santa each night on our behavior. No one can touch Paco, or he'll disappear. On Dec. 24th, we found him in the Lucky Charms box on the counter. We think he was picking out all of the marshmallows.
2. The weather is finally cool enough that I have to wear shoes. Sometimes.
3. Rowan and I took an afternoon during the holidays and had our toenails done... red with white dots (snow) and a star.
4. Rowan dressed herself. She does this often, but I don't always capture the end product on film.
5. Elias got an award at school for Academic Achievement.
6. Molly the dog has taken to doing Puppy Yoga. I have no idea how this pose is physiologically possible, but she does it all the time. Crazy animal.
7. Maura & Elias enjoyed candycanes.
8. Maura's first candycane. It ended with her screaming (literally) for more.
9. Rowan, dressed with fairy wings, sparkly shoes and the mandatory helmet, goes for a bike ride on a sunny December day.
10. My folks came to visit! The kids with my Dad.
11. Nonno gets a hug from Maura.
12. Nonno & Nonna with the three littles. I hate living so far apart.
13. Crazy hair day at school. And missing teeth.
14. Rowan the baker.
15. Homemade marshmallows (courtesy of Martha Stewart-- thank you Marci for the tutorial!)
16. My folks gave Rowan my old cassette collection (minus the Bangles & Wilson Phillips... where did those go?) and an old RCA tape player. She is IN HEAVEN.
17. Elias makes a craft at his school's Christmas party.
18. JT and I rock the ugly sweaters at the Ugly Sweater/White Elephant party. (The gift I ended up with is a brown t-shirt that says, "I pooped today." with a little star on it.)
19. Watching the Smurfs on the projector. Lots of lovely, lazy evenings this month.
20. We surprised Elias and I took him to a matinee of Wicked on Hollywood Blvd. He loves the soundtrack and kept asking to see the movie. As there is no film of this production, we decided it was time to introduce him to the theater.
21. E & I inside the Pantages Theater.
22. The LA LDS Temple lights.
23. JT & Rowan on the train. We bundled up (yes, it was actually chilly one night!) and rode through a small light set-up. A fun new tradition.
24. Elias, Maura and I on the train with a creepy guy behind. I never saw him get on, I never saw him get off. The ghost of the small light set-up?? Hmmm.
25. Can you say, "leftovers"?
26. Santa brought Maura a rocking horse.
27. Santa brought JT a new bowtie.
28. I make pasta.
29. Maura and Peyton, 5 days apart in age, figure out a smartphone.
30. Elias plays the Wii (a gift from Santa)... we have yet to teach him how to play while sitting down.
31. Elias looses another tooth. Four current holes in his mouth, 2 more loose. Oy.
32. All the holiday fun finally makes Maura melt down.
33. It was too dark for the camera to focus, and yet it produced my favorite image of the month. Rowan and the Christmas tree.
I hope you've all had a happy and meaningful Christmas Season! Happy New Year's Eve eve!
2. The weather is finally cool enough that I have to wear shoes. Sometimes.
3. Rowan and I took an afternoon during the holidays and had our toenails done... red with white dots (snow) and a star.
4. Rowan dressed herself. She does this often, but I don't always capture the end product on film.
5. Elias got an award at school for Academic Achievement.
6. Molly the dog has taken to doing Puppy Yoga. I have no idea how this pose is physiologically possible, but she does it all the time. Crazy animal.
7. Maura & Elias enjoyed candycanes.
8. Maura's first candycane. It ended with her screaming (literally) for more.
9. Rowan, dressed with fairy wings, sparkly shoes and the mandatory helmet, goes for a bike ride on a sunny December day.
10. My folks came to visit! The kids with my Dad.
11. Nonno gets a hug from Maura.
12. Nonno & Nonna with the three littles. I hate living so far apart.
13. Crazy hair day at school. And missing teeth.
14. Rowan the baker.
15. Homemade marshmallows (courtesy of Martha Stewart-- thank you Marci for the tutorial!)
16. My folks gave Rowan my old cassette collection (minus the Bangles & Wilson Phillips... where did those go?) and an old RCA tape player. She is IN HEAVEN.
17. Elias makes a craft at his school's Christmas party.
18. JT and I rock the ugly sweaters at the Ugly Sweater/White Elephant party. (The gift I ended up with is a brown t-shirt that says, "I pooped today." with a little star on it.)
19. Watching the Smurfs on the projector. Lots of lovely, lazy evenings this month.
20. We surprised Elias and I took him to a matinee of Wicked on Hollywood Blvd. He loves the soundtrack and kept asking to see the movie. As there is no film of this production, we decided it was time to introduce him to the theater.
21. E & I inside the Pantages Theater.
22. The LA LDS Temple lights.
23. JT & Rowan on the train. We bundled up (yes, it was actually chilly one night!) and rode through a small light set-up. A fun new tradition.
24. Elias, Maura and I on the train with a creepy guy behind. I never saw him get on, I never saw him get off. The ghost of the small light set-up?? Hmmm.
25. Can you say, "leftovers"?
26. Santa brought Maura a rocking horse.
27. Santa brought JT a new bowtie.
28. I make pasta.
29. Maura and Peyton, 5 days apart in age, figure out a smartphone.
30. Elias plays the Wii (a gift from Santa)... we have yet to teach him how to play while sitting down.
31. Elias looses another tooth. Four current holes in his mouth, 2 more loose. Oy.
32. All the holiday fun finally makes Maura melt down.
33. It was too dark for the camera to focus, and yet it produced my favorite image of the month. Rowan and the Christmas tree.
I hope you've all had a happy and meaningful Christmas Season! Happy New Year's Eve eve!
Listed below are links to blogs that reference this entry:
My life in Instagram Photos - Dec. 2011
. TrackBack URL for this entry:
http://rachelclarephoto.com/darkroom/mt/mt-tb.cgi/266
I've been thinking for the past couple of weeks about why I am a photographer, and why I love it. I've spent countless hours and thousands of dollars in equipment and workshops honing my craft, often staying up very late at night to work on things so as to not take away time from my family during the hours that they are awake. I've made some wonderful self-discoveries along the way, and have learned that it's okay to say no, that it's okay to do things a little differently, and that I don't have to appologize for certain things. I've learned who I am as an artist and I've finally realized, in the past year or so, why I do what I do.
There are a lot of things that come to my mind when I think about my "why?", but I'm going to focus on just one- the big one.
It makes me weep to admit that I have almost no photographs from any of those days. It's a fact that haunts me every day, and will only become more painful as the years go on. It is my single biggest regret.
We eloped. Well, we essentially eloped. We told immediate family and three mutual friends. We had dated for a while and were engaged for three weeks. I borrowed a friend's dress. He wore an old suit. It was sweet and simple and intimate and very much "us". I have no regrets from that day except for the fact that we didn't hire a proper photographer (oh, and that whole doing-my-own hair thing? That was a big mistake too... but I digress...).
So there's that.
Then there's the lack of me-and-my-children photos. I know people who look amazing after just giving birth. I've seen their pictures. (You know, the ones on Facebook where the new mother looks like she just had brunch with her girlfriends at the Nordstrom Cafe?) I'm not one of those people. I'm the kind of new mom who looks like a Chocolate Lab who just had 10 puppies. And while at the time, the last thing I wanted was a camera in my face, I now mourn the fact that I have no pictures of me and my babies in the hospital. These are things that can never be replaced.
Never, ever, ever.
I studied photography in college when I attended Northern Arizona University in the late-90's. At the time I studied landscape photography and only shot film. At some point, it just didn't fill me as much as it once did. But as I learned more about myself and my own style and emotion, I started to develop in my art. I realized that I could be more than a picture-taker. I could be someone who gives others a gift- the gift of memories. It started to dawn on me that I can't go back and change my own past. I don't have the precious images that I long for from the most important days of my life, but I do have the ability to give that to others, and in doing so, bless their lives.
This is what drives me. This is what excites me. This is where the "passion" comes from that so many photographers claim to have. I have passion about my art because I pull it from a place inside of me that is raw and tender and emotional. I give to people a gift I can never have, but that I long for. I would pay any amount of money to have four missing albums on my shelf today. I can't ever have that, but I can give it to others.
And somehow, in a way I still don't understand, that kind-of makes it okay.
There are a lot of things that come to my mind when I think about my "why?", but I'm going to focus on just one- the big one.
Here's the Reader's Digest version:
I've
been married for almost 12 years. I have three beautiful children.
The four most important days of my whole life are these: the day I got
married, and the day I delivered each of my babies.It makes me weep to admit that I have almost no photographs from any of those days. It's a fact that haunts me every day, and will only become more painful as the years go on. It is my single biggest regret.
We eloped. Well, we essentially eloped. We told immediate family and three mutual friends. We had dated for a while and were engaged for three weeks. I borrowed a friend's dress. He wore an old suit. It was sweet and simple and intimate and very much "us". I have no regrets from that day except for the fact that we didn't hire a proper photographer (oh, and that whole doing-my-own hair thing? That was a big mistake too... but I digress...).
So there's that.
Then there's the lack of me-and-my-children photos. I know people who look amazing after just giving birth. I've seen their pictures. (You know, the ones on Facebook where the new mother looks like she just had brunch with her girlfriends at the Nordstrom Cafe?) I'm not one of those people. I'm the kind of new mom who looks like a Chocolate Lab who just had 10 puppies. And while at the time, the last thing I wanted was a camera in my face, I now mourn the fact that I have no pictures of me and my babies in the hospital. These are things that can never be replaced.
Never, ever, ever.
I studied photography in college when I attended Northern Arizona University in the late-90's. At the time I studied landscape photography and only shot film. At some point, it just didn't fill me as much as it once did. But as I learned more about myself and my own style and emotion, I started to develop in my art. I realized that I could be more than a picture-taker. I could be someone who gives others a gift- the gift of memories. It started to dawn on me that I can't go back and change my own past. I don't have the precious images that I long for from the most important days of my life, but I do have the ability to give that to others, and in doing so, bless their lives.
This is what drives me. This is what excites me. This is where the "passion" comes from that so many photographers claim to have. I have passion about my art because I pull it from a place inside of me that is raw and tender and emotional. I give to people a gift I can never have, but that I long for. I would pay any amount of money to have four missing albums on my shelf today. I can't ever have that, but I can give it to others.
And somehow, in a way I still don't understand, that kind-of makes it okay.
Shara says:
Yes Rach...You do give people a gift. You have such an amazing talent, but you are also an amazing person with LOTS of talents, goodness & love. I feel so blessed we are friensd.
Shara says:
And you're HOT...for the record. Which makes it a lot easier to look at you. Bahahahahaha (I just had to add that after looking at the cute pic of you at the top of your blog) So random...
(12.23.11 @ 02:27 PM)
rachel clare says:
hahahaha! Shara, I love you. You will never cease to make me laugh- one of the best qualities a friend can have! xo!
(12.23.11 @ 03:01 PM)
Rebecca says:
This reads like a story from my own book. You put it beautifully. Thank you for sharing this.
(12.23.11 @ 03:25 PM)
Marci says:
I'm so glad you do what you do. Thanks for all the memories you have captured for our family! Especially today....
(12.23.11 @ 07:21 PM)
Anonymous says:
I too have much from my wedding day except some snap shots. We had a pro at the Ohio reception but I don't even own an eight by ten. His parents have one I their wall and I have thought of asking to have it even bought its noty favorite or of the temple. I feel your pain.
(12.24.11 @ 01:51 PM)
Kristie says:
Oh girl, you make me laugh... Chocolate Lab... hahahahaha! I love you! This is truly beautiful! xo
(01.01.12 @ 11:06 AM)
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My "Why?"
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Three little words:
They are smitten.
(Who wouldn't be?)
They are smitten.
(Who wouldn't be?)
Great Aunt Kitty says:
These photos are to be treasured - she is so beautiful - but why is that a surprise - she has beautiful and loving parents. I just love these photos!!!!!!! Welcome Avery to our world .
(12.06.11 @ 02:01 PM)
Jen says:
What a darling baby! Such a cutie-pie. Love the connections in these images & the lovely location. That last one needs to be a canvas!
(12.12.11 @ 04:30 PM)
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Avery
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I know the most amazing woman. She is strong in a way I'm not sure I could ever be. Shara has too many admirable qualities to list here, but more than anything, I love that she is consistently happy and optimistic. This year has started a new chapter in her life, and I've been so blessed to witness the joy that emanates from her family.
As she had 4 of her 5 kids together for Thanksgiving, we took advantage and had a photo-date. Cameron, we missed you and your cute wife! Hopefully soon, we'll get everyone, all together.
And now, though a little off-topic, I want to wish Shara well as she heads to Hawaii next week to run her first 26.2.
I'm so proud of you, friend! xoxo!
Jordan is known far and wide for his ability to quote movie lines. He's phenomenal, and the following are just a snippet:: 
Jordan! You slay me! 
As she had 4 of her 5 kids together for Thanksgiving, we took advantage and had a photo-date. Cameron, we missed you and your cute wife! Hopefully soon, we'll get everyone, all together.
And now, though a little off-topic, I want to wish Shara well as she heads to Hawaii next week to run her first 26.2.
I'm so proud of you, friend! xoxo!
Jordan is known far and wide for his ability to quote movie lines. He's phenomenal, and the following are just a snippet:: Jordan! You slay me!
Shara says:
Rachel....I'm seriously stunned!! OMGOSH...I'm screaming through my house...hahaha. I LOVE THESE. YOU are amazing. I'm so lucky to have you in my life. You're not only an AMAZING photographer, but an amaizing person. Lucky me :) Thank you soooo much!!
rachel clare says:
Shara, you win. Nicest comment ever goes to YOU. :)
(12.01.11 @ 02:25 PM)
Jen says:
What great images! Sometimes it can be hard to capture connections and real emotion with older children, but you nailed it! They look so happy & loving. Wonderful work!!
(12.12.11 @ 04:32 PM)
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Shara & family
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This is awesome! Well said, I love it!
(01.05.12 @ 09:38 AM)LOVE this. It is perfect and simple and real. Such a great vision for the year. You nourish me my friend!
(01.05.12 @ 10:04 AM)I love this. I too have made similar decisions for this year! Thank You for sharing these!
(01.05.12 @ 10:30 AM)I've always been inspired by your attitude Rachel! You are amazing. Happy 2012!
(01.05.12 @ 11:45 AM)I love this!! You're amazing :)
(01.05.12 @ 01:02 PM)